Pam’s Thoughtful Spot

MY FREAKING DIVORCE PAPERS!!!  This is the FOURTH time!

I swear, I’m going to lose my damn mind if I get them back again.

This time, since we filed a response, we need to sign the second page of  our judgment paper.

Oh but guess what?

THERE ARE NO SIGNATURE LINES!

That’s correct my friends, they wrote in two x’s and lines so we could sign.   There aren’t even instructions to say that you need to do this!

Like HOW THE FUCK am I supposed to figure that out?

By the way, they wrote the signature lines in with RED ink.  How much do you want to bet that they send them back to me again insisting that I white out the red ink and redo the fake lines with black?

Yes, this is another post about my STBExH.

I’m still dealing with the fact that he is moving in with the marriage wrecking whore (MWW).

Today, he shows up at my desk looking very sheepish and tells me “I have something to tell you which you won’t like but I don’t want you to hear from anyone else”.

I’m thinking..you’re engaged, she’s knocked up…what could it be?

His big news?  He’s going on vacation for a week in October.

So I say “Why is this important to me?”

He is taking her to the East Coast.  New England to be exact.  On a scouting trip.  In case they want to move there.

Interesting considering that for three years, he and I talked about going to New England.  On a scouting trip.  In case we wanted to move there.

I don’t even know why he felt he needed to tell me.  In two weeks, I will have hardly any contact with him and wouldn’t even know or care where he went on vacation.  I believe that he honestly thinks that he is doing me a favor by telling me these things, when instead I just want to smack him upside the head for being an insensitive asshole.

I managed to not cry from anger and frustration.  I did manage to cry on the way home.

The best part?  He told me I couldn’t tell his dad about him going on this excursion.  Somehow I think his dad may have unknowingly paid for it.

I’m taking the high road and I’m not sending his dad an anonymous letter.

A note to my STBExH:  Karma is a bitch.

How funny is it that our network administrator is watching our network status with his eyes closed?

(resisting urge to flick m&ms at him until he wakes up)

This is the first week in three years that I have had to work all five days.

(Before you go all sarcastic-poor-thing on me, youi try holding down a job with a billion things wrong with you and see how you do.)

It is especially exhausting because I´m only used to seeing my STBexH two or three times a week and not all week.  I had no idea how draining it is to see him.  It really is.  Not that I hate him, but it´s a constant reminder.  CONSTANT.

It is also a reminder that in two weeks he´s moving in with his marriage wrecking whore of a girlfriend.  My how his standards lowered.

I think that is one of the things that really bothers me.  Now, I´m not claiming to be a perfect person but if someone is married - I know that means hands off until they are separated. (and I´ve been in the situation).  So the fact that my ex is with someone who was okay with dating a married man really bothers me.  Like where are his morals?  Although he is apparently okay with being with someone that has no problem with that which proves he´s not the right  guy for me.

Still…it makes me think I should have held out for a better person. (and if any of my ex´s read this - I´m sure they are like ¨Uh, yeah you dumbass)

I hope have a nice miserable cheating life together - seems like they are perfect for each other.  Just wish I could be a fly on the wall when my STBexH introduces her to his father.

Now that will be funny…

Waiting for me in the mail today…

My divorce papers.  again.  sent back to me for the freaking THIRD time!

First time:  blue ink

Second time: A form that was clearly listed as Option A to specify property splitting was apparently listed incorrectly and resulted in my filling out form B.

Third time:  Another form clearly listed as Option A to specify spousal support is also apparently not a valid option and so I either have to fill out form B or write in my answer on another form.

I swear.  My STBExH and I have:

a) already split up property

b) have been living separate lives for 6 months now

c) He’s moving in with his girlfriend

JUST STAMP THE FRAKING FORMS AS DIVORCED ALREADY!!!

The breaking up with my STBExH was the easy part – this is a nightmare.  This is probably the smoothest easiest divorce on the planet, no lawyers, no kids, no big assets, we filled out the damn paperwork together for christssake!

But, you know, we can’t have blue ink.  GOD FORBID.

What is it about the Olympics that makes people sports experts for two weeks?

I was about the only one on the planet that didn’t watch the Olympic Opening Ceremony friday OR see the US 400x medley relay flash finish.  So I’m making up for lost time tonight.

Apparently, I should be a Men’s synchronized swimming judge.   I could also call some Women’s Beach Volleyball.

The May/Walsh team is  really really good.  They are currently creaming Cuba.

Nice block Walsh!

Although can someone explain to me what the hell is on her shoulder?  Or why they had to spend 20 minutes detailing the loss and discovery of Walsh’s wedding ring?  Sucks, yes.  Happy she got it back, yes.  Didn’t need to see the metal detection action shots.

I would say that this beach volleyball looks really easy but then I flash back to High School PE.

Let’s just say, I was always picked last.

This past week something happened that I should be happy about but I´m not quite sure how I feel about it.

My STBExH is being transferred to San Diego and will be working as a tech at the facility where his girlfriend works.

He will be moving in with her.  In three weeks.

I know that being separated will be good for us. I guess having him at work has been an emotional crutch for me.

In any case, I’m feeling sorta melancholy about it all.

Not that I would ever take him back… I know that he and I are not meant to be spouses. I suppose it is all part of the divorce grief crap. This is just another step in the untangling of our lives.

There is a part of me that is laughing out loud though. She has a studio apartment - no kitchen. It will be the two of them, in one room, and working together. The fact that he will be miserable in his new living arrangements makes me happy. In the show “Avenue Q” there is a song about that called “Schadenfreude” (happiness at the misfortune of others).

It is my favorite song.

Not that I want him to be miserable forever - but it makes it easier for me to know that his life isn’t all hearts and flowers.   Petty of me, yes.

The suck thing about divorce is that sometimes you are alright with the situation and feel great about the fact that you get a “do over” and other times you go around thinking that your STBExH is an asshole rat bastard.

Right now, I’m in asshole rat bastard mode.